November 25, 2009
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Five (5) Alternative Plausible Explanations
Every time I go to delete and block someone because they are just so irritating and offensive (and that means pretty much every time they open their mouths), I have to stop myself for a moment, just to give them the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps, just perhaps, it was not their entire life mission just to ruin my day by being mean to me. Matter of fact, maybe they didn’t mean anything by it at all!
Indeed perhaps there was something else going on with them, namely, that thing with being distracted or ‘in a mood’ but the thing is, those really aren’t the people I mean. The people to whom I refer are the people who consistently bug me with what seem to be entirely unnecessarily odious or inflammatory comments, but they are not total troll material. I would call them ‘borderline’ but just above that line of ‘troll’ which, once crossed, makes blogging life so much easier and less confusing.
But, back to the first excuse, and even if there was nothing else going on with them (in particular) it is also possible that they meet one of the following five criteria , any one of which would explain their uncanny ability to push buttons, and any one of which might exempt them from that automatic block/delete button: as follows:
1. perhaps English is not their first language.
Think this sounds silly? Right. Try living in a region with a bunch of people who have only the must rudimentary skills with the English language, and you will see exactly what I am talking about. For example, try living in, say, Nepal, and everyone around you is fairly new to English. So, let’s say, someone is talking to you, and they tell you something that surprises you, and you use an American slang for surprise, namely, “You’re Kidding!”
Just see how that goes over as an exclamation of surprise. Good luck explaining what you meant by that! And if things could be that confusing in one direction, imagine how they might be equally confusing from another. Furthermore, I am convinced that the phrase “You’re a stupid idiot” is not so offensive to Europeans as it is to Americans, otherwise, why would they, the Europeans, use it so often?
2. perhaps They Are Cognitively “Different”
Every time I start to get really exasperated with someone who seemly always says the “exact wrong thing” I have to ask myself, hey? “What if this person is like, say, Rain Man or Monk, or even, say like Lenny from Of Mice and Men? Is it really worth getting irritated by someone who is so totally, um, different? Probably not, I mean think about it.
3. perhaps They are Australian
Before you jump all over me, here me out, and then you can go ahead and jump all over me. I mean maybe it’s just because I’m American and Australians are not particularly impressed by Americans (to put it sweetly) but I have noticed, for a fact, that many of the people who have exhibited the knack for saying the exact wrong thing to me every time they comment on one of my blogs have been the Australians and why else might that be?
Well, just go live there for a while if you’ve not done so, and if you are not one of them either, then, when you get home, tell me what you think. There is a sort of “raw honesty” to the Australians, as a people, that we Americans, as a people, tend to find a little on the crude side. Perhaps, for example, a tendency to say a bit more than really needs to be said, without any serious concern for offending anyone or ‘hurting their feelings’ which they would consider just…cry baby-ish. Just the way they are, but don’t take it from me.
4. perhaps They are Sagittarian
OK you think I’m kidding, but I’m not really, but before you go all off on accusing me of discrimination, give the Sagittarians a chance to speak up for themselves because I believe that most of them will tell you outright that it is so. Jupiter rules Sag., and Jupiter is notoriously HUGE. Jupiter is the planet of EXCESS. It is also the main planet of luck and blessings, but that is not really relevant to what I’m talking about here. I’m talking about a tendency to the “too much” and gaffe prone in the extreme, Sag is notorious for foot-in-mouth syndrome, and if you don’t believe me, just ask ‘em.
Just got an unfortunate haircut? Count on Sag to scream out “Hey! What in God’s name happened to your hair?” Gained or lost 50 pounds since you last saw them? Count on Sag to point it out to you and everyone around you! “Hey, lay off on the donuts mate, about to blow away ain’t ya? (oops, didn’t mean to segue back into Auzzie…). “Hey man, eating KFC every night of the week or what?” Either way, Sag never gets it that people usually are already way too well aware of what’s wrong with them, and don’t need to have it pounded in. But the point is, they really don’t get it. Hating them is pretty much back to the same thing as hating Lenny in Of Mice and Men. Just, well, stupid!
5. Well, there was one more category, but I forgot what it was.
I mean it’s true that Librans can be problematic for people like me because of their tendency to play Devils Advocate. If I want someone to play Devils Advocate, I would communicate solely with this ex of mine from the ancient past with whom I have not communicated in, like, forever. And it is also true that I have never dated a Libra again after that one, and so be it, because if I am going to be in a relationship, I prefer someone either take my side in those things about which I feel most strongly, or else just shut up. But that is a topic for another blog…and so I’ll save it.
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So, can you think of any categories (I say “just drunk” is not in this category of forgivable … after X number of episodes the person should realize they are a MEAN DRUNK just need to quit drinking…as in, like, forever)
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